Best Jokes

Husband: Look dear, I just bought us one of those plug in air fresheners. But for some reason it's not working.

Wife: It's not plugged in.

Husband: You mean I have to plug it in for it to start freshening the air?

Wife: It's a plug in air freshener. How can it work if you don't plug it in?

Husband: It makes no scents!

Some guy bought a new fridge for his house. To get rid of his old fridge, he put it in his front yard and hung a sign on it saying "Free to good home, You want it... you take it."

For three days the fridge sat there without even one person looking twice at it. He eventually decided that people were too untrusting of this deal so he changed the sign to read "Fridge for sale $50."

The next day someone stole it.

A man was stopped by the fish and game warden. He had with him two buckets of fish. The fish and game warden asked the man, "Do you have a license to catch all those fish?"

The man replied to the game warden, "No, sir. These are my pet fish."

"Pet fish?" the warden replied.

"Yes, sir. Every night I take these here fish down to the lake and let them swim around. After a while, I whistle and they jump back into their buckets, and I take them back home again."

"That's a bunch of hogwash! Fish can't do that!" was the outburst from the Warden.

The man looked at the game warden for a moment, and then said, "Here, I'll show you. It really works." The man poured the two buckets of fish into the lake and stood and waited. After several minutes, the game warden turned to the man and said, "Well?"

"Well, what?" the man responded.

"When are you going to call them back?" the game warden prompted.

"Call who back?" the man asked.

"The FISH!" the warden said.

"What fish?" the man asked.

I would think you'd have to be open minded to be a brain surgeon...