Best Jokes

What do you call somebody with no body and a nose?

Nobody knows!

Two zombie students were on the way to their high school in Los Angeles when they spotted a white BMW with the actress Halle Berry stopped at a red light. Seizing the opportunity, they immediately rushed the car, dragged the startled Ms. Berry from the front seat, and ate her brain.

Dragging the corpse behind them as they walked to school, they suddenly remembered that their school was having a contest to see who could best decorate the corridors of the school for Christmas.

Sure enough, they won the contest. The name of their entry, "Deck the Halls with Bowels of Halle!"

Do you know why medical facilities in Phoenix, Arizona treat substantially more tourist for heat exhaustion every summer than they do locals?

It’s because tourist think you can actually tan outside.

"Hey Mom, my DNA sample results are back from the genealogy place. According to the report I have 44 points of Neanderthal DNA. Does that mean I’m related to a cave man?"

"Yes, dear, it’s from your father’s side of the family."