Best Jokes

I told my wife I wished she’d come with directions. She said this is a first, as I’ve never heard you ask for directions before.

She also said not to worry that she "did" come with directions and has been giving them to me since the day we met.

My girlfriend’s father wants her to marry a man of means. He said he would give me her hand in marriage if I can afford to burn ten thousand dollars as if it were nothing.

Without hesitation I wrote a check for ten grand and burnt it right before his eyes.

I’m still single.

Why are professional skiers always politically correct?

Because it's a slippery slope!