Best Jokes

3 votes

I have this friend. His name is Sam Katz.

One day he bragged to me that, "Everyone knows Sam Katz!"

I said, "You don't know the president of the United States." He said , "Let's go to the White House and I'll prove it."

So we went to the White House and Barack Obama greeted him and said to him, "Hey Sam Katz! How are you doing?"

After all the greetings I said, "You don't know Queen Elizabeth."

He said, "Let's go to Buckingham Palace and I'll prove it."

So we go there and the Queen says "Sam Katz, so good to see you again!"

After the greetings I said to him, "Okay. One last person, you don't know the pope."

He said, "Let's go to the Vatican and you wait outside and we'll come outside by the window and wave to you."

So that's exactly what we do. The next thing I do is faint.

My friend asked me, "What happened to you? I tell him, "It was one thing when you knew the president. It was another thing when you knew the queen. But when you came out with the pope by the window, and the guy next to me asked, "Who's the guy with Sam Katz?" I completely lost it.

3 votes

CATEGORY Misc Jokes
posted by "Dan the Man 009" |
$25.00 won 3 votes

Me: Doctor, Doctor my sister thinks she is a lift!

Doctor: Well tell her to come in.

Me: I cant! She doesn't stop at this floor.

3 votes

CATEGORY Doctor Jokes
posted by "Kyoto" |
$8.00 won 3 votes

Vincent Van Gogh had a really large family. Here's a listing of some of the lesser known relatives:

The really obnoxious brother - Please Gogh
The brother who ate prunes - Gotta Gogh
His dizzy aunt - Verti Gogh
An aunt who taught positive thinking - Wayto Gogh
And his magician uncle - Wherediddy Gogh

3 votes

CATEGORY Misc Jokes
posted by "HENNE" |
3 votes

A man named Benny meets a genie who grants him three wishes. Benny wishes for a fine house, a beautiful wife, and a million dollars.

The genie grants his wishes, but warns him that can never shave his beard, or he will be turned into an urn. Benny enjoys his life for many years, but his lovely wife doesn't like his beard and asks him to shave it off. Though afraid of the genie's prophesy, Benny shaves his beard, and is immediately turned into an urn.

THE MORAL: A BENNY SHAVED IS A BENNY URNED!

3 votes

CATEGORY Puns
posted by "Writer Guy" |