Best Jokes

My mind works like lightning...

One second there's a brilliant flash, and then it's gone!

The coffee shop had a sign that read: Pretend its 1973!

So I paid 10 cents and lit up a cigarette.

One day Al was driving to the lake for a swim when he noticed a man on the side of the highway dressed all in red.

“Who are you?” asked Al as he pulled up to the stranger.

“I’m the Man in Red and I’m very hungry,” said the man.

Reaching into his lunch sack, Al pulled out a sandwich, handed it to the man, then sped off down the road.

A few miles later, Al spotted another man, this time dressed all in yellow.

“What can I do for you?” asked Al.

“I’m the Man in Yellow and I’m very thirsty.”

Pulling out a can of soda, Al handed the Coke to the man , then resumed his journey.

Anxious to get to the lake before sunset, Al put his foot to the pedal and roamed off down the road, only to spot yet another man, dressed all in blue, signaling for Al to stop.

“Don’t tell me!” said Al impatiently. “You’re the Man in Blue, right?”

”That's right!” replied the man.

”Well, what do you want?”

”Driver’s license and registration, please.”

I've been thinking of a career change. I went to a career counselor and found out in testing that I scored off the charts for having a highly dynamic persona and a great smile.

I was also told I'm not very good at follow through nor do I accomplish much though I do appear to look busy.

Here's the good news! My career counselor told me to "run for public office", even though I'm over qualified!