Mary had a little lamb...
And two nurses who passed out in the delivery room.
My husband has always had a beard. One day, he decided to shave it off. He came into the room where my 5-year-old daughter Samantha was and asked her, "Notice anything different?"
To which she replied, "No," with a puzzled look on her face.
My husband then said to her, "My beard's gone."
Now the puzzled look disappeared and the innocent eyes appeared when she said, "I didn't take it!"
I was waiting tables in a noisy lobster restaurant in Maine when a vacationing Southerner stumped me with a drink order. I approached the bartender. “Have you ever heard of a drink called ‘Seven Young Blondes’?” I asked.
He admitted he’d never heard of it, and grabbed a drink guidebook to look it up. Unable to find the recipe, he then asked me to go back and tell the patron that he’d be happy to make the drink if he could list the ingredients for him. “Sir,” I asked the customer, “can you tell me what’s in that drink?”
He looked at me like I was crazy. “It’s wine,” he said, pronouncing his words carefully, “Sauvignon blanc.”
Two circus acrobats got married...
They just FLIPPED over each other!