Best Jokes

I got pulled over for speeding.

Officer: “What’s your name?”

Me: “Last name is Goman”

Officer: “And your first name?”

Me: “Frida”

Officer: “You’re Frida Goman?”

Me: “Why thank you! I’ll just be on my way then.”

It always irked my mother that her grocery store didn’t carry eggs in packages of six—just by the dozen.

Then one day, her wish came true. She walked into the grocery and found fresh eggs in cartons of six!

She was so excited, she bought two!

Last October my wife bought a magnolia tree from the local nursery, but after only a few weeks the leaves shriveled. It appeared to be on its last legs.

My wife took some leaf samples and marched into the nursery to demand an explanation.

"I know exactly what's wrong with your magnolia," said the manager.

"Good," said my wife. "What's it suffering from?"

"Autumn," he replied.