Latest Jokes

$15.00 won 10 votes

The quarrel had reached a new height when the wife said to her spouse, "I wish I'd taken my mother's advice and never married you."

Hubby swung around, "Do you mean to tell me that your mother tried to stop you from marrying me?"

Wife nodded in the affirmative.

"Good heavens," cried the husband, his voice filled with remorse. "How I've wronged that woman."

10 votes

CATEGORY Family Jokes
Joke Won 3rd Place won $15.00
posted by "Egbert" |
1 votes
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An old man went to his doctor complaining of aches and pains all over his body. After a thorough examination, the doctor gave him a clean bill of health.

“You’re in excellent shape for a 75-year-old man,” he said. “But I’m afraid I can’t make you any younger.”

“Who asked you to make me younger?” the man replied. “You just make sure I keep getting older!”

1 votes

CATEGORY Elderly Jokes
posted by "Harry Finkelstein" |
$7.00 won 5 votes

I had been in heaven as an Apprentice Angel for about three months and was enjoying my stay. The day came when I was called to visit God.

GOD: "You are about to get your wings."

ME: "Lemon pepper of Barbeque?"

GOD: "Get out... just go..."

5 votes

Joke Won 8th Place won $7.00
posted by "Retired Terp" |
$8.00 won 6 votes

Seeing her friend Marcia wearing a new locket, Ashley asks if there is a memento of some sort inside.

“Yes,” says Marcia, “a lock of my husband’s hair.”

“But Larry’s still alive?”

“I know, but his hair is gone.”

6 votes

CATEGORY Marriage Jokes
Joke Won 7th Place won $8.00
posted by "S.Sovetts" |