"Look! There's Linda Rondstadt!"
"Where? Where is she?"
"Right there! Here she comes, running full speed, right at you!"
"I still don't see her."
"You idiot! She just Blue Bayou!"
When I was a teenager, I worked as a bagger for the local supermarket. One of the rules there was baggers cannot accept tips when helping people bring groceries to their car. One day I was putting groceries in an old man's car. When he was finished he said, "Here young man. I want you to have a picture of your uncle George."
What it really was, was a dollar bill. Thinking quickly, I pocketed the 'picture'. I then asked him, "Have any pictures of my grandfathers Ulysses and/or Benjamin?"
A little old lady was driving the wrong way down a one-way street and was stopped by a cop.
“Didn’t you see the arrows?” he asked.
“Arrows? I didn’t even see the Indians!” she exclaimed.
A robber walked into a music store and then everybody got down!