Latest Jokes

A man walked into a game and toy store looking for a challenging board puzzle so he asked the clerk for just such a puzzle. The clerk replied, "Well sir, it depends on what you consider to be challenging?"

The man replied, "What do you mean it depends on me, I didn't make the puzzle so how am I supposed to know if it's challenging? Don't you know your products young man?"

The clerk replied, "Well sir, it tells you on the box how complex the puzzle is. Lets see here, oh yes, this one should be perfect. Right here on the front of the box it says it takes 3-4 ages to complete."

A drunk gets up from the bar and heads for the bathroom. A few minutes later, a loud, blood curdling scream is heard from the bathroom. A few minutes after that, another loud scream reverberates through the bar.

The bartender goes into the bathroom to investigate why the drunk is screaming. "What's all the screaming about in there? You're scaring the customers."

"I'm just sitting here on the toilet and every time I try to flush, something comes up and squeezes the hell out of my testicles."

With that, the bartender opens the door, looks in and says, "You idiot! You're sitting on the mop bucket!"

In a software design meeting, we were using typical technical jargon to discuss a data exchange interface with a vendor.

One co-worker said the programming we had ordered was delayed because the vendor was suffering from a "severe non-linear waterfowl issue."

Curious, the team leader raised his eyebrows and asked, "What exactly is that?"

The programmer replied, "They don't have all their ducks in a row."

What do you call a cow eating grass?

A land moo'er.