What did the shark say to the clam when it would not share its candy?
Why are you so shellfish?
What do two snails do when they have a disagreement?
Slug it out!
Why did the ceiling fan go to the boxing match?
For the blow-by-blow action.
A big-city counterfeiter decided the best place to pass off his phony $18 bills would be in some small, out of the way, town. So, he got into his new wheels and off he went.
He found a tiny town with a single store. He entered the store and handed one of the bogus bills to the man behind the counter. "Can you change this for me, please?" he said.
The store clerk looked at the $18 bill a short time, then smiled and told the man, "Sure, Mister. You want 2 nines or 3 sixes?"