Latest Jokes

One day a husband says to his wife, “Today is a fine day!” Next day he says it again. “Today is a fine day.” Again next day, he says same thing, “Today is a fine day.”

Finally after a week, the wife asks her husband, “Since last week, you are saying today is a fine day. I am fed up. What’s the matter?”

"Last week when we had an argument, you said, 'I will leave you one fine day.' I was just trying to remind you."

A baby turtle was standing at the bottom of a large tree and with a deep sigh, started to climb. About an hour later, he reached a very high branch and walked along to the end. He turned and spread all four flippers and launched himself off the branch. On landing at the bottom in a pile of soft, dead leaves, he shook himself off, walked back to the bottom of the tree and with a sigh started to climb.

About an hour later, he again reached the very high branch, walked along, turned, spread his flippers and flung himself off the branch. Again, he landed on the bottom, shook himself off, went to the bottom of the tree, sighed and started climbing.

Watching these proceedings from the end of the branch were two birds. The Momma bird turned to Daddy bird and said, "Don't you think it's time we told him he was adopted?"