Latest Jokes

1 votes

What’s the first thing a person says when they spot a UFO or Big Foot?

"Honey, do we still have that one megapixel camera?"

1 votes

posted by "Marty" |
1 votes

When tempted to fight fire with fire...

... always remember that the fire department usually uses water.

1 votes

posted by "wadejagz" |
2 votes

1. Men are like Laxatives... They irritate the crap out of you.
2 Men are like Bananas... The older they get, the less firm they are.

3. Men are like Weather... Nothing can be done to change them.
4. Men are like Blenders... You need one, but you're not quite sure why.

5. Men are like Chocolate Bars... Sweet, smooth, & they usually head right for your hips.
6. Men are like Commercials... You can't believe a word they say.

7. Men are like Department Stores... Their clothes are always 1/2 off!
8. Men are like Government Bonds... They take too long to mature.

9. Men are like Mascara... They usually run at the first sign of emotion.
10. Men are like Popcorn... They satisfy you, but only for a little while.

2 votes

posted by "Harry Finkelstein" |
$7.00 won 2 votes

I was at the hardware store to get a duplicate of my car key made when the store clerk said, “You’re a model?”

It was exactly what a woman in her mid-30’s wanted to hear. “Well, no, I’m not,” I said, blushing. “But, I’m flattered that...“

He stopped me right there, pointed to my car keys and slowly repeated, “Year…and…model?”

2 votes

posted by "Philip Farris" |