Why did the itsy-bitsy spider run up the water spout?
He heard a tech company executive was there hiring web designers.
"Why did you choose to be cremated?"
"Being cremated is my last chance to have a smoking hot body!"
Why Dogs and Cats are better than children...
1) Eat less and don't ask for money all the time
2) Are easier to train and normally come when called
3) Don't smoke or drink
4) Don't want to wear your clothes
5) If they get pregnant, you can sell their children
I ordered an extension course, “How to Deal With Life’s Disappointments”.
Yesterday, I got the first lesson in the mail.
It was an empty envelope.