While on a field trip to a local petting zoo Little Johnny breathlessly rushed up to his teacher and shouted out, "Teacher, teacher, I just saw a man making a horse!"
"Oh, Johnny, are you sure?" asked the teacher.
"Of course," said Johnny, "they were tacking on his feet as I walked by!"
Texas makes me think of the old slogan "Remember the Alamo."
It seems that during that battle, the guy in charge of the whole thing put his wife, of all people, on the battle line. She was shot by the enemy, shattered her patella, and had to be removed from the front line.
After the fighting was over, she divorced her husband, and sued for Alamo-knee.
There was a man driving down the road behind an 18 wheeler. At every stoplight the trucker would get out of the cab, run back and bang on the trailer door. After seeing this at several intersections in a row the motorist followed him until he pulled into a parking lot.
When they both had come to a stop the truck driver once again jumped out and started banging on the trailer door. The motorist went up to him and said, "I don't mean to be nosey, but why do you keep banging on that door?"
To which the trucker replied, "Sorry, can't talk now, I have 20 tons of canaries and a 10 ton limit, so I have to keep half of them flying at all times."