One of my employees who was deeply involved in finishing a report for the upcoming board meeting received a call from his wife that had good news and bad news.
Because of the deadline he asked if she could just give him the good news. The wife replied "Okay, the good news is that the air bags work."
Sitting behind a couple of nuns at a baseball game (with their habits partially blocking the view), three men decided to badger the nuns in an effort to get them to move.
In a very loud voice, the first guy said, "I think I'm going to move to Utah, there are only 100 nuns living there."
The second guy spoke up and said, "I want to go to Montana, there are only 50 nuns living there.
The third guy said," I want to go to Idaho, there are only 25 nuns living there."
One of the nuns turned around, looked at the men, and in a very sweet calm voice said,
"Why don't you go to Hell... there aren't any Nuns there."