Latest Jokes

$10.00 won 11 votes

Our doctor’s office called to let my husband know that the results from his blood tests came back and he was just fine. That didn’t suit my husband.

“What’s my cholesterol level?” he asked.

“Mr. Crocker, you are just fine,” insisted the nurse.

“Still, I’d like you to mail me the results.”

A few days later, he received a postcard from the doctor’s office. It read, “Mr. Crocker, you are just fine!”

11 votes

CATEGORY Doctor Jokes
posted by "Chloe2015" |
3 votes

Recently, I called to make reservations on a small charter plane that departs from Teterboro airport in New Jersey.

I knew that I would be flying in a very small plane, so I was not surprised when the clerk said, "The plane is very full with baggage and passengers." Then she asked, "How much do you weigh, sir?"

Not thinking clearly I answered, "With or without clothes?"

"Well," said the clerk, "how do you intend to travel?"

3 votes

CATEGORY Airplane Jokes
posted by "HENNE" |
5 votes

Joe passed away. His will provided $30,000 for an elaborate funeral.

As the last guests departed the affair, his wife, Helen, turned to her oldest friend. "Well, I'm sure Joe would be pleased," she said.

"I'm sure you're right," replied Jody, who lowered her voice and leaned in close. "How much did this really cost?"

"All of it," said Helen. "Thirty thousand."

"No!" Jody exclaimed. "I mean, it was very nice, but $30,000?"

Helen answered. "The funeral was $6,500. I donated $500 to the church. The wake, food and drinks were another $500. The rest went for the memorial stone."

Jody computed quickly. "$22,500 for a memorial stone? My God, how big is it?!"

"Two and a half carats."

5 votes

CATEGORY Marriage Jokes
posted by "HENNE" |
2 votes

A mother brought her child to school to register him. However, the child was only five and the age required was six.

“I think,” the mother said to the principal, “that he can pass the six-year-old test.”

“We’ll see,” replied the principal. Then to the child, the principal said, “Son, just say a few words that come to your mind.”

“Do you want logically connected sentences,” asked the child, “or purely irrelevant words?”

2 votes

CATEGORY Kid Jokes
posted by "Dan the Man 009" |