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Favorite this joke Two sailors were marooned on a tropical island. One insisted on building a raft and leaving immediately. The other wanted to wait and rest.
"Yea, but if these cannibals catch you, they'll eat you," said the first.
"I don't care. Let them kill me, let them throw me in the pot and cook me. They'll be sorry. "
"Why?"
"Because I'm not what I'm cooked up to be," retorted the second.
An inmate at the local detention center was sitting in his cell playing solitaire. Another inmate was watching. Finally the kibitzer spoke up, "Wait a minute. I just caught you cheating yourself."
"Shhh! Don't tell anybody but for years I've been cheating at solitaire. "
"You don't say! Did you ever catch yourself cheating,?"
"Nah, I'm too clever."
"So tell me, Mrs. Smith," asked the interviewer, "have you any other skills you think might be worth mentioning?"
"Actually, yes," said the applicant modestly. "Last year I had two short stories published in national magazines, and I finished my novel."
"Very impressive," he commented, "but I was thinking of skills you could apply during office hours."
Mrs. Smith explained brightly, "Oh, but that was during office hours."
This past spring my church was flooded along with other places in the area. On the day back one of the Sunday School teacher decided to have a lesson on Noah and The Ark.
She asked the question: "Did you know that all the animals came on the ark in pairs?"
After some discussion, the teacher's fears were realizes as Little Johnny was waving his hand to be called on.
Little Johnny volunteered, "Teacher, all but the worms! They came on board in the apples."
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