Latest Jokes

$15.00 won 3 votes

A man waiting for a bus held his hands about four inches apart. He got on the bus l, and when the driver asked for his fare, the man told him to take the money out of his coat pocket. The driver did as he said and drove on.

The man walked to the rear of the bus and sat down, still holding his hands in the same position. A woman passenger turned to him and asked, “Excuse me sir, are you alright?”

“Yes I am, thank you,” he replied.

“Then why are you holding your hands like that?”

“Because I’m on my way to a hardware store and I need a piece of pipe this long.”

3 votes

posted by "Dan the Man 009" |
4 votes

A pessimist and an optimist were on a hike and they came across railroad tracks at a tunnel.

The Pessimist looked in and said, "I see a light and the train is coming."

The Optimist looked and said, "Don't worry, we have time."

The Engineer operating the train said, "Why are those morons still standing on the track?"

4 votes

posted by "Joseph Fabian" |
$10.00 won 13 votes

Husband: "Now that we are married, perhaps I might venture to point out a few of your little defects."

Wife: "Don't bother, dear. I'm quite aware of them. It was those little defects that prevented me from getting a much better man than you."

13 votes

CATEGORY Marriage Jokes
posted by "maryjones" |
$7.00 won 10 votes

"Johnny, why are you late?" asked the teacher angrily.

"Sorry teacher, it was late when I left home."

"Then why didn't you start earlier?"

"Sorry, at that point it was too late to start earlier."

10 votes

posted by "Egbert" |