My secretary liked to yammer on the phone with friends.
One day I was about to interrupt her chat to tell her to get back to work, when she looked up at the clock and put an end to the conversation.
“Sorry, I have to hang up now,” she said. “It’s time for my break.”
My friend had been pounding the pavement in search of a job with no luck. Frustrated, she asked her dad to look at her résumé. He didn’t get much further than the first line of her cover letter before spotting the problem.
“Is it too generic?” she asked.
“I doubt it,” said her father. “Especially since it’s addressed ‘Dear Sir or Madman.’”
There was a businesswoman who had just completed a huge development project for an obscenely rich investor. When she was leaving the investor's office he offered her diamonds, rubies and a silver-plated luxury car, but she declined.
The investor insisted, so she said that she just started to golf and maybe a set of golf clubs would be nice.
A few weeks later she received a message from him: "So far I have bought you three golf clubs. I hope you aren't disappointed that only two of them have swimming pools."