"My Friday is ruined!"
"Why, what happened?"
"I realized today is Tuesday."
Evidence has been found that William Tell and his family were avid bowlers.
However, all the Swiss league records were unfortunately destroyed in a fire, and we'll never know for whom the Tells bowled.
What did the cell say when his sister stepped on his toe?
You should always be nice to your children...
...they pick which nursing home you go to when you get really old!