Latest Jokes

Donald: Hi, Daisy...

Daisy: Don’t talk to me! I’m so mad I can’t speak! I was driving on Oak Street and a policeman gave me a ticket for going the wrong way!

Donald: Sure, Oak’s a one way street. It’s against the law to drive north on Oak.

Daisy: That’s just the point! I wasn’t going north, I was going east!

There once was a man from Pawtucket...

Who kept all his cash in a bucket...

His daughter, named Nan...

Ran off with a man...

And as for the bucket - Nantucket!

My friend keeps saying, “Cheer up, it could be worse, you could get stuck underground in a hole full of water.”

I know he means well.

During a recent meeting of the local Optimist Club, they challenged one another to come up with an inspirational sentence using the word countenance.

This was the winning entry: "I put a cheerful countenance on people every day."

It was submitted by our local funeral director.