elderly jokes

Category: "Elderly Jokes"
2 votes
 

An elderly man was sitting on his porch rocking back and forth. He seemed to be having a long discussion with himself. Every once in a while he broke into loud laughter. At other times, he shouted “Phooey” in disgust.

A policeman passing by stopped to watch the man and asked him what was going on. “I’m telling myself jokes,” the old man told him. “And if I say so myself, most of them are funny.”

“Then why do you keep saying ‘phooey’?" the policeman asked.

“I only say that when I heard ‘em before.”

2 votes

CATEGORY Elderly Jokes
posted by "D-Gellybean" |
7 votes

Looking for the appropriate book for a couple celebrating fifty years of marriage I went to the antique book store.

Asking the owner for a suggestion, he had a recommendation.

He recommended a copy of Parkman's "A Half Century of Conflict."

7 votes

CATEGORY Elderly Jokes
posted by "Egbert" |
1 votes

An old man went to his doctor complaining of aches and pains all over his body. After a thorough examination, the doctor gave him a clean bill of health.

“You’re in excellent shape for a 75-year-old man,” he said. “But I’m afraid I can’t make you any younger.”

“Who asked you to make me younger?” the man replied. “You just make sure I keep getting older!”

1 votes

CATEGORY Elderly Jokes
posted by "Harry Finkelstein" |
5 votes

A teenage boy and his grandfather go fishing one day. While fishing, the old man starts talking about how times have changed. The young man picks up on this and starts talking about the various problems and diseases going around.

The teen says, "Grandpa, they didn't have a whole lot of problems with all these diseases when you were young did they?"

Grandpa replies, "Nope."

"Well, what did you guys use for safe sex?"

"A wedding ring."

5 votes

CATEGORY Elderly Jokes
posted by "Harry Finkelstein" |