family jokes

Category: "Family Jokes"
1 votes

One day my housework-challenged husband decided to wash his sweatshirt. Seconds after he stepped into the laundry room, he shouted to me, "What setting do I use on the washing machine?"

"It depends," I replied. "What does it say on your shirt?"

He yelled back, "Just do it!"

1 votes

CATEGORY Family Jokes
posted by "GDL" |
$7.00 won 3 votes

A successful businessman wanted to send his elderly mother a very special gift for her birthday, a rare South American endangered bird valued at $5,000.

When he called his mother to see how she liked the surprise gift he was shocked when she said, "It was quite small, but tasted very good."

He asked her, after her shocking reply, "Mom, that was a $5000 bird that can speak five languages and you ate him?"

"Well, if he could speak five languages he should have spoken up."

3 votes

CATEGORY Family Jokes
posted by "Bumpa Hennigar" |
$15.00 won 8 votes

(Father) Your mother tells me your first prom dance is coming up!
(Son) Yes, but I don’t think I’m going. What if I ask a girl and she says no?
(Father) Son, never fear rejection. Just keep asking until some nice young lady accepts your invitation.

(Son) Did you go to your first prom dance?
(Father) I sure did and I never let rejection hold me back!

(Son) Does this mean the first girl you asked said no?
(Father) Yes. In fact, many said no but I didn’t give up.

(Son) Did you have fun?

(Father) I sure did! And if you don’t believe me, ask your Aunt Suzy, we had a ball.

8 votes

CATEGORY Family Jokes
posted by "Marty" |
5 votes

Grandfather: Back in my day we didn’t need all these fancy gizmos for entertainment. We had a cardboard box and played with it for hours; now that’s real fun!

Grandson Billy: Really ?!?!

Billy’s mother: Yes Billy, of course they had fun. We are talking about a generation of kids who also ate mud pies!

5 votes

CATEGORY Family Jokes
posted by "Marty" |