Best Jokes

Upon arrival, the lumberjack started to swing at the tree, when the tree suddenly shouted, “Wait! I’m a talking tree!”

The lumberjack grinned and said, “And you will dialogue!”

As we left the gym after our first real workout in years, my husband and I both felt energized. "Let's make a commitment to do it three times a week," I said.

"Absolutely," my husband agreed, "three times at a minimum."

"And no whining," I said. "No excuses."

"No, we'll do it," he said enthusiastically, "you can count on it."

"And on my late night, we can just meet here at the gym."

"The gym?" my husband said, confused. "I thought we were talking about sex?"

There was a lawyer who was a big U2 fan...

Yeah, he was pro-Bono!

A bachelor is defined as:

A man who has missed the opportunity to make some woman miserable.