Best Jokes

Down at the Veteran's hospital, a trio of old timers ran out of tales of their own heroic exploits and started bragging about their ancestors.

"My great grandfather, at age 13," one declared proudly, "was a drummer boy at Shiloh."

"Mine," boast another, "went down with Custer at the Battle of Little Big Horn."

"I'm the only soldier in my family," confessed vet number three, "but if my great grandfather was living today he'd be the most famous man in the world."

"What'd he do?" his friends wanted to know.

"Nothing much. But he would be 165 years old."

Yellowstone tourist: "Look at all those big rocks! Wherever did they come from?"

Yellowstone guide: "The glaciers brought them down."

Tourist (cluelessly): "But where are the glaciers?"

Guide (wearily): "The glaciers ... have gone back for more rocks."

I don't believe in reincarnation...

I didn't believe in it the last time, either.