What do you call words that upset rabbits?
They're called 'Hare Triggers.'
"I'm ashamed of you," the mother said. "Fighting with your best friend is a terrible thing to do!"
"He threw a rock at me!" the boy said. "So I threw one at him."
The mother said, "When he threw a rock at you, you should have come to me."
"Thanks, Mom," the boy replied. "But my aim is much better than yours."
People you do not want to hear say, "OOPS!":
• Your surgeon.
• Your dentist.
• Your nurse.
• Your hairdresser.
• Your mechanic.
• Your gardener.
• Your tax accountant.
• The computer tech person.
• The house painter.
• The pilot.
• The crew installing your roof.
• Your lover.
I started a new workout routine this week, doing crunches twice a day...
I do Cap'n in the morning and Nestle's in the afternoon.