Best Jokes

1 votes

After a trial had been going on for three days, Harrison, the man accused of committing the crimes, stood up and approached the judge's bench.

"Your Honor, I would like to change my plea from 'innocent' to 'guilty' of the charges."

The judge angrily banged his fist on the desk. "If you're guilty, why didn't you say so in the first place and save this court a lot of time and inconvenience?" he demanded.

Harrison looked up wide-eyed and stated, "Well, when the trial started I thought I was innocent, but that was before I heard all the evidence against me."

1 votes

CATEGORY Judge Jokes
posted by "HENNE" |
1 votes

The dumb girl drove to the shopping mall and found a parking spot which had a sign that read, "1 Hour Only,"

She wanted two hours to shop, so she parked across two spaces.

1 votes

CATEGORY Misc Jokes
posted by "HENNE" |
1 votes

During training exercises, the Lieutenant was driving down a muddy back road when he encountered another car stuck in the mud, with a red-faced Colonel at the wheel.

"Your jeep stuck, sir?" asked the Lieutenant as he pulled alongside.

"Nope," replied the Colonel, coming over and handing him the keys, "Yours is!"

1 votes

CATEGORY Military Jokes
posted by "Anonymous" |
1 votes

1. Everyone has a photographic memory. Some don't have film.

2. He who laughs last, thinks slowest.

3. A day without sunshine is like, well, night.

4. Change is inevitable, except from a vending machine.

5. I just got lost in thought. It was unfamiliar territory.

6. When the chips are down, the buffalo is empty.

7. Seen it all, done it all. Can't remember most of it.

8. Those who live by the sword get shot by those who don't.

9. I feel like I'm diagonally parked in a parallel universe.

10. You have the right to remain silent. Anything you say will be misquoted and used against you.

1 votes

CATEGORY Misc Jokes
posted by "merk" |