Best Jokes

A 92 year-old man went to the Doctor to get a physical. A few days later the Doctor saw the man walking down the street
with a gorgeous young lady on his arm.

A couple of days later the Doctor talked to the man and said, "You're really doing great, aren't you?"

The man replied, "Just doing what you said, Doctor. Get a hot mamma and be cheerful."

The Doctor replied, "I didn't say that. I said, You got a heart murmur. Be careful."

At school, Little Johnny's classmate tells him that most adults are hiding at least one dark secret, so it's very easy to blackmail them by saying, "I know the whole truth." Little Johnny decides to go home and try it out.

Johnny's mother greets him at home, and he tells her, "I know the whole truth." His mother quickly hands him $20 and says, "Just don't tell your father." Quite pleased, the boy waits for his father to get home from work, and greets him with, "I know the whole truth." The father promptly hands him $20 and says, "Please don't say a word to your mother."

Very pleased, the boy is on his way to school the next day when he sees the mailman at his front door. The boy greets him by saying, "I know the whole truth." The mailman immediately drops the mail, opens his arms, and says, "Then come give your Daddy a great big hug!"

If someday we all go to prison for downloading music...

I hope they split us by music genre.