Best Jokes

1 votes

The dumb girl drove to the shopping mall and found a parking spot which had a sign that read, "1 Hour Only,"

She wanted two hours to shop, so she parked across two spaces.

1 votes

CATEGORY Misc Jokes
posted by "HENNE" |
1 votes

During training exercises, the Lieutenant was driving down a muddy back road when he encountered another car stuck in the mud, with a red-faced Colonel at the wheel.

"Your jeep stuck, sir?" asked the Lieutenant as he pulled alongside.

"Nope," replied the Colonel, coming over and handing him the keys, "Yours is!"

1 votes

CATEGORY Military Jokes
posted by "Anonymous" |
1 votes

My wife was in labor with our first child. Things were going pretty well when suddenly she began to shout, "Shouldn't, couldn't, wouldn't, didn't, can't!"

"Doctor, what's wrong with my wife?"

"Nothing. She's just having contractions."

1 votes

CATEGORY Baby Jokes
posted by "merk" |
1 votes

1. Everyone has a photographic memory. Some don't have film.

2. He who laughs last, thinks slowest.

3. A day without sunshine is like, well, night.

4. Change is inevitable, except from a vending machine.

5. I just got lost in thought. It was unfamiliar territory.

6. When the chips are down, the buffalo is empty.

7. Seen it all, done it all. Can't remember most of it.

8. Those who live by the sword get shot by those who don't.

9. I feel like I'm diagonally parked in a parallel universe.

10. You have the right to remain silent. Anything you say will be misquoted and used against you.

1 votes

CATEGORY Misc Jokes
posted by "merk" |