Every time a little boy went to a playmate’s house, he found the friend’s grandmother deeply engrossed in her Bible. Finally his curiosity got the better of him.
“Why do you suppose your grandmother reads the Bible so much?” he asked.
“I’m not sure,” said his friend, “but I think she’s cramming for finals.”
Daughter: Alexa, play Let It Go.
Dad: When I was your age, I had to call a radio station, wait on hold for 30 minutes to request a song, then sit by my boom box for an hour for my song to play with a blank cassette tape so I could record it.
Daughter: I don't understand any of that.
Teacher: "Missouri is the 'Show ME' state, Florida is the 'Sunshine State'. Does any one know the motto of Washington D.C.?"
Teacher: "No one? Does anyone wish to venture a guess?"
5th grade student: "Is it the 'Plausible Deniability' state?"
A man and his wife were lying in bed the other night when he noticed she had bought a new book entitled, "What 20 Million American Women Want."
He grabbed the book out of her hands and started thumbing through the pages.
His wife was a little annoyed. "Hey, what do you think you're doing?"
He calmly replied, "I just wanted to see if they spelled my name right."