Best Jokes

How can you lift an elephant with one hand?

Let's be real here, you are never going to find an elephant that has only one hand!

A young man, hired by a supermarket, reported for his first day of work. The manager greeted him with a warm handshake and a smile, gave him a broom and said, "Your first job will be to sweep out the store."

"But I'm a college graduate," the young man replied indignantly.

"Oh, I'm sorry. I didn't know that," said the manager. "Here, give me the broom, I'll show you how."

The commander of an army base had assembled all his troops for an exercise in combat. He told his troops.."When I give the order... fire at will!"

Just then one of the soldiers was seen running away. The commander barked out, "Who is that guy running away?"

"That's Will, sir!"

How does a farmer patch his pants?

He uses a Cabbage Patch!