One day in Oz, Dorothy, The Tin Man, The Cowardly Lion, and The Scarecrow were playing high stakes Texas Hold'Em Poker.
Everyone put in their ante except for Dorothy. The Tin Man asked her, "We all put in our ante except for you. Where's your ante?
Dorothy replied, "I thought I told you guys before. My auntie is in Kansas!"
This sentence contradicts itself... no, wait, actually it doesn't.
Guy: Do you wanna hang out this Friday?
Girl: Sorry, but I am getting married this Friday!
Guy: Wow, well congratulations! Then how about this Saturday?
What do you call a snowman in Florida?
Water.