Best Jokes

One night I woke myself up with a loud "Hello!" to someone in my dream. As the next day came and went, I thought the nocturnal outburst was mine alone to remember.

But that night, as my wife and I were getting ready for bed, she said dryly, "If you see anyone you know tonight, just wave."

Talk is cheap . . .

Until you hire a lawyer.

Creditors have much better memories than debtors.

Never put off till tomorrow what you can ignore entirely.