Best Jokes

Customer: Waiter, Do you have any Wild Duck?

Waiter: No, but I can get a tame one and irritate it for you?

Why is it that if you donate a kidney, it's a good thing...

But if you donate five kidneys, it's a bad thing and they call the police.

“Teacher, I ain’t got no pencils,” says little Tom.

The teacher corrects him immediately saying, "The correct way to say it is, I don’t have any pencils, he doesn’t have any pencils, or they don’t have any pencils.' Do you understand?"

“But teacher..."

"Yes, Tommy?"

"What happened to all the pencils?”

A rodeo bull rider had four disastrous runs of less than 5 seconds during the preliminary rounds of the event.

Several experienced bull riders stopped by his locker to see how he was doing.

"Those were some rough rides, pardner!" said one of the pros.

He responded, "Well, this IS my first rodeo."