Best Jokes

Three guys walk into a bar...

You would've thought the third one would've ducked.

A 10-year-old child was having a conversation with their grandmother while eating breakfast...

Child: "Nanna, I'm a chubby old man."

Grandmother: "What did you say?"

Child: "I'm a chubby old man."

Grandmother: "Now why would you say something like that?"

Child: "Well, everybody says I look just like my daddy."

Kids today don't know how easy they have it. When I was young, I had to walk 9 feet through shag carpet to change the TV to one of nine channels.

Jill's car was unreliable and she called John for a ride every time it broke down. One day John got yet another one of those calls...

John: "What happened this time?"

Jill: "My brakes went out. Can you come get me?"

John: "Where are you?"

Jill: "I'm in the drugstore."

John: "And where's the car?"

Jill: "It's in here with me."