Best Jokes

Catelin: My Mom has the worst memory.

Amanda: She forgets everything?

Catelin: No, she remembers everything!

"You know, I think everyone should divide their worldly goods with the other fellow," said an office worker to another.

"That's a good idea. If you had two thousand dollars would you give me half?"

"Sure."

"And if you had two automobiles, would you give me one?"

"Sure."

"And if you had two shirts, would you give me one?"

"No."

"No? Why?"

"Because I have two shirts."

A baby mouse sees a bat flying overhead and says, "Mom! I think I see an angel!"

The trial went on for 4 weeks with testimony by both sides. Finally, the jury retired to determine the verdict.

After 2 days the jury had reached a decision to acquit the prisoner.

Judge: "What possible reason could you have for acquitting the prisoner?"

Foreman: "Insanity, sir."

Judge: "What, all twelve of you?"