Best Jokes

$6.00 won 5 votes

Studying our wedding photos, my six-year-old asked, “Did you marry Dad because he was good-looking?”

“Not really,” I replied.

“Did you marry him for his money?”

“Definitely not,” I laughed. “He didn’t have any.”

“So,” he said, “you just felt sorry for him?”

5 votes

CATEGORY Marriage Jokes
posted by "Mary" |
5 votes

Shortly after reporting to the 101st Airborne Division, we were ordered to fall out in our dress uniforms. Only problem was, I didn't know how to tie a necktie. So I asked the guy in the next bunk for help.

"Sure," he said. "Lie down."

Confused, I lay down on the bunk and he tied my tie. "Sorry, but this is the only way I know how," he said. "Comes from practicing on my father's clients."

"What does your father do?"

"He's a mortician."

5 votes

CATEGORY Military Jokes
posted by "wadejagz" |
$50.00 won 5 votes

"Doctor, doctor, I swallowed a bone."

"Are you choking?"

"No, I really did!"

5 votes

CATEGORY Doctor Jokes
posted by "RS" |
$12.00 won 5 votes

Me: "Oh God, please save me!"

God: "Would you prefer as a JPEG file or a PDF file?"

5 votes

CATEGORY Teacher Jokes
posted by "Kyoto" |