Best Jokes

A farmer was milking his cow. He was just starting to get a good rhythm going when a bug flew into the barn and started circling his head.

Suddenly, the bug flew into the cow's ear. The farmer didn't think much about it until the bug squirted out into his bucket.

It went in one ear and out the udder.

Teacher: "Okay class let's start by sharing our dreams. What's yours David?"

David: "My dream is to earn $20,000 a month like my dad."

Teacher: "Wow! Your dad earns that much?"

David: "No ma'am, that's also my dad's dream."

"When is it bad luck to see a black cat?"

"When you're a mouse???"

Studying our wedding photos, my six-year-old asked, “Did you marry Dad because he was good-looking?”

“Not really,” I replied.

“Did you marry him for his money?”

“Definitely not,” I laughed. “He didn’t have any.”

“So,” he said, “you just felt sorry for him?”