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Favorite this joke A Navy officer was cutting through the crew's quarters of his ship one day and happened upon a sailor reading a magazine with his feet up on the small table in front of him.
"Sailor! Do you put your feet up on the furniture at home?" the officer demanded.
"No, sir, but we don't land airplanes on the roof either."
The percussionist, tired of being teased by her band-mates, decides to switch instruments.
She walks into the local music shop, points to her choices and says, “I’ll take that trumpet and that accordion.”
The shop assistant looks at her for a second and replies, “Okay, you can take the fire extinguisher, but the radiator’s not for sale.”
A nurseryman called a customer that had purchased and had decorated his Christmas tree for years, not knowing that he just had the worst of a financial deal.
Nurseryman: "Are you ready to order your Christmas tree and schedule delivery and decorating it for this year?"
Customer: Yes, I'm ready to schedule delivery but I am going to have my broker decorate it this year."
Nurseryman: "Why your broker?"
Customer: "Its the only thing he hasn't trimmed."
"What is your brother's name?"
Little Jane: "I don't know yet. We can't understand a word he says."
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