My Friend Benny kept dropping his phone and cracking his screen. He went through a seemingly endless series of visits to cellphone screen replacement shops, and sometimes ending up having to buy a whole new phone.
I finally asked him the obvious. "Why don't you order a case?"
A few days later he got a large box delivered with 24 iPhones inside.
The computers in the cash counting room in one of Las Vegas’ biggest casinos all crashed, and the workers were forced to count and tally the money by writing down the totals on a ledger.
There was cash in piles covering the entire counting table.
One of the workers called the I.T. Department for a solution to the computer snafu. Suddenly, he hung up the phone, walked over to the table, and swept the piles of money into a burlap sack.
“What are you doing?” yelled one of his co-workers.
“The I.T. guys told me to clear the cash.”
My wife asked me if I wanted to watch Batman Forever on Netflix.
I said, “No, only for the next couple of hours.”
A lumberjack once told me he's cut down 27,572 trees.
"How do you know exactly how many" I replied.
“Easy, I keep a log..."