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Favorite this joke I may not be my mom's favorite child...
But I know I am the first one that comes to mind when the police show up.
An American manufacturer is showing his machine factory to a potential customer from a foreign country. At noon, when the lunch whistle blows, two thousand men and women immediately stop work and leave the building.
"Your workers, they're escaping!" cries the visitor. "You've got to stop them."
"Don't worry, they'll be back," says the American. And indeed, at exactly one o'clock the whistle blows again, and all the workers return from their break.
When the tour is over, the manufacturer turns to his guest and says, "Well, now, which of these machines would you like to order?"
"Forget the machines," says the visitor. "How much do you want for that whistle?
Apparently someone in London gets stabbed every 52 seconds.
Poor guy.
A man is walking across a bridge when he notices a little boy crying. Concerned, he walks up to the boy and asks, "Say, what's wrong, young fellow?"
"My sandwich fell in the water." the boy sobs.
Perplexed but sympathetic, the man says, "Oh, I'm very sorry, it must have been a very delicious sandwich. Was it with ham and cheese?"
"No." the boy sniffles.
"Well, was it with just cheese?"
"No."
"Was it with peanut butter and jelly?"
"No," the boy wails. "It was with my brother!"
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