A mother was visiting her son on an Army base, and chatted with a colleague of his.
"What rank are you?" she asked.
"I'm relieved to say that I've just been promoted from captain to major."
"Because," he replied, "my last name is Hook."
Seeing a homeless guy begging on the street, a woman took pity on him and gave him a handful of change.
“Thank you,” said the homeless man. “Your generosity is much appreciated. You know my life used to be great, but just look at the state of me now.”
“How do you mean?” asked the woman.
“Well,” he explained. “I was a multi-millionaire. I had bank accounts all over the world with hundreds of thousands of dollars deposited in each.”
“So where did it all go wrong?” she asked.
The homeless man sighed, “I forgot my mother’s maiden name.”