Latest Jokes

A man came in late for work one day for the second time that week. His boss called him into her office and said, “What’s your excuse this time?”

He shrugged and said, “My clock didn’t go off and I overslept.”

She replied, “You could at least tell me something I haven’t heard before.”

He replied, “You are looking lovely today.”

My face in the mirror isn’t wrinkled or drawn.

My house isn’t dirty. The cobwebs are gone.

My garden looks lovely and so does my lawn.

I think I might never put my glasses back on.

A manager announces to his staff, “I’ve lost a wallet with 500 dollars, if you find it, I’m offering a 100 dollars finder’s fee!”

A voice in the background says, “I’m offering 200!”