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Favorite this joke Two old men are sitting on a bench. A truck passes on the road. It is pulling a trailer loaded with turf. One of the men says, "See, that's what I will do when I win the lottery."
"What?" asks the other one confused.
"I will send my grass away for cutting!"
Deciding to eat healthier breakfasts, my brother-in-law declared that oatmeal would now be his cereal of choice.
But after eating his first bowl, he told my sister, "I hope I develop a taste for the stuff. It goes down real rough."
"Well," she asked, "how long did you cook it?"
"You're supposed to cook it?" he said.
Wikipedia: “I know everything.”
Google: “I have everything.”
Facebook: “I know everybody.”
Internet: “Without me you’re nothing.”
Electricity: “Keep talking losers.”
During the Revolutionary War, England lost the battle of Saratoga because General Howe stayed in Philadelphia...
So they lost due to "lack of no Howe"!
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