animal jokes

Category: "Animal Jokes"
5 votes

Rhonda’s dishwasher quit working so she called a repairman. Since she had to go to work the next day, she told the repairman, “I’ll leave the key under the mat. Fix the dishwasher, leave the bill on the counter, and I’ll mail you a check. Oh, by the way don’t worry about my bulldog. He won’t bother you. But, whatever you do, do NOT, under ANY circumstances, talk to my parrot! I REPEAT, DO NOT TALK TO MY PARROT!!!”

When the repairman arrived at Wanda’s apartment the following day, he discovered the biggest, meanest looking bulldog he has ever seen. But, just as she had said, the dog just lay there on the carpet watching the repairman go about his work.

The parrot, however, drove him nuts the whole time with his incessant yelling and name calling. Finally the repairman couldn’t contain himself any longer and yelled, “Shut up, you stupid ugly bird!”

To which the parrot replied, “Get him, Spike!”

5 votes

CATEGORY Animal Jokes
posted by "HENNE" |
$9.00 won 5 votes
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The chicken wanted to go out on a Saturday night but could not find a sitter.

What do they do with the kids?

They decided to CARTON them around.

5 votes

CATEGORY Animal Jokes
Joke Won 6th Place won $9.00
posted by "barber7796" |
2 votes

What did the Bloodhound say after the briefing?

"Smells like a plan!"

2 votes

CATEGORY Animal Jokes
posted by "Jonathan Wendt" |
4 votes

It was a baby mosquito's first day to fly out from home.

When the mosquito came back home later that day, the father mosquito asked, "How was your journey?"

The baby mosquito replied, "It went great, everyone was clapping for me!"

4 votes

CATEGORY Animal Jokes
posted by "mickey" |