Three dogs met on a street corner. The first was a beautiful black poodle with a big blue ribbon around its neck, and it said, "My name is Fifi, spelled F-I-F-I."
The second was a pretty white poodle with a red satin ribbon around its neck, and it said, "My name is Mimi, spelled M-I-M-I."
The third was a dirty old mutt and said, "My name is Fido, spelled P-H-Y-D-E-A-U-X."
A guy walks into a restaurant with a small dog. The waiter says, "Sir, I'm very sorry, but we don't allow dogs in here."
The guy replies, "But this isn't just any dog ... this dog can play the piano!"
The waiter responds, "Well, if he can play that piano, you both can stay and have a meal on the house!"
So the guy sits the dog on the piano stool, and the dog starts playing. Ragtime, Mozart ... and the waiter and patrons are enjoying the music. Suddenly a bigger dog runs in, grabs the small dog by the scruff of the neck, and drags him out.
The waiter asks the guy, "What was that all about?"
The guy says, "Oh, that was his mother. She wanted him to be a doctor."