Best Jokes

Client: "No one ever agrees with me!"

Psychiatrist: "You don’t seem like the disagreeable type!"

Client (raising one eyebrow): “I digress.”

A lawyer returns to the parking lot to find his sports car with the headlights broken and considerable damage to the front end.

There's no sign of the offending vehicle but he's relieved to see that there's a note stuck under the windshield wiper: "Sorry, I just backed into your car. The witnesses who saw the accident are nodding and smiling at me because they think I'm leaving my name, address and phone number. But I'm not."

A buddy of mine has two tickets for the 2017 Super Bowl. Box seats, plus airfares, accommodations, etc. But he didn't realize when he bought them that this is going to be on the same day as his wedding, so he can't go.

If you're interested and want to go instead of him, it's at St Peter's Church in New York City at 5pm. Her name's Louise. She will be the one in the white dress.

Thanks for your help!

Why did the chicken cross the road?

To go to the house where the most gullible person in the world lives.

Knock, Knock
Who's there?

The Chicken