Best Jokes

Little Johnny was late for class, and when he saw that the door was already closed, he opened it and went into the classroom tentatively. He very quietly shut the door and tiptoed to his seat hoping not to get the teacher after him. This upset the teacher, who said him, "Johnny, is this how your father would have come in - late and sneaking to his seat? Go out and try it again, and get it right this time!"

So, Little Johnny left the room and shut the door behind him quietly, as he'd come in. Then a moment later, he flung open the door with a clatter and stomped back into the room. He slammed the door behind him, "So Honey, didn't expect ME, didya?"

The topic for my third-grade class was genetics. Smiling broadly, I pointed to my dimples and asked, “What trait do you think I passed on to my children?”

One student called out, “Wrinkles!”

Most people will say, "If it ain't broke, don't fix it."

An engineer will say, "If it ain't broke, it doesn't have enough features yet."