Best Jokes

A minister decided that a visual demonstration would add emphasis to his Sunday sermon. Four worms were placed into four separate jars.

- The first worm was put into a container of alcohol.
- The second worm was put into a container of cigarette smoke.
- The third worm was put into a container of chocolate syrup.
- The fourth worm was put into a container of good clean soil.

At the conclusion of the sermon, the minister reported the following results:

- The first worm in alcohol - Dead.
- The second worm in cigarette smoke - Dead.
- Third worm in chocolate syrup - Dead.
- Fourth worm in good clean soil - Alive.

Just then a little old woman in the back quickly raised her hand and said, "I get it! As long as you drink, smoke and eat chocolate, you won't have worms!"

The word F.E.A.R. has many different acronyms, but the one I like the best is...

(F)orget (E)verything (A)nd (R)un... ... ...

Especially when you're confronted by a very hungry Bear!

Two gas company servicemen, a senior training supervisor and a young trainee, were out checking meters in a suburban neighborhood. They parked their truck at the end of the alley and worked their way to the other end.

At the last house a woman looking out her kitchen window watched the two men as they checked her gas meter. Finishing the meter check, the senior supervisor challenged his younger coworker to a foot race down the alley back to the truck to prove that an older guy could outrun a younger one.

As they came running up to the truck, they realized the lady from that last house was huffing and puffing right behind them. They stopped and asked her what was wrong.

Gasping for breath, she replied, "When I see two gas men running as hard as you two were, I figured I'd better run too!"

George Washington was such a great president.

He never blamed any of the country's problems on the previous administration.