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Favorite this joke I went to the library the other day and found a book titled "How to Hug".
Wanting to learn the secrets of intimacy I quickly grabbed the book and headed to the checkout counter.
The librarian was polite but said I couldn't check out the book because it was the seventh volume of Encyclopedia Britannica.
When I was eight my Dad was taking me to see a movie. On the way there I asked him if he would buy me some gum. He said, "No, you don't need any."
After arriving at the theater and taking ours seats, Dad changed his mind. He told me it would be okay for me to have some gum and he was going to get it.
I spoke up and said, "You don't need to buy me gum anymore, Daddy. I found some under the seat."
Sign on a maternity room door...
"Push, Push, Push!"
A forester often has to consult property owners to determine boundary lines. Walking up a dirt road to question one such individual, a forester encountered signs that read: "No Trespassing", "Beware of Dog", and "Keep Out... This Means You!"
Finally arriving at the door, he talked with the congenial, cooperative landowner.
When my husband was ready to leave, the man said to him, "Come and see me again sometime. I don't get many visitors up this way."
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