Best Jokes

1 votes

The minister gave his Sunday morning service, as usual, but this particular Sunday, it was considerably longer than normal.

Later, at the door, shaking hands with parishioners as they moved out, one man said, "Your sermon, Pastor, was simply wonderful - so invigorating and inspiring and refreshing."

The minister, of course, broke out in a big smile, only to hear the man say, "Why I felt like a new man when I woke up!"

1 votes

posted by "HENNE" |
1 votes

One day in basic training the drill sergeant came out and said, "I need two volunteers for garbage duty."

When no one spoke up the drill sergeant pointed to two privates and said, "Okay, you and you!"

One of the privates said, "But I didn't volunteer?"

"Were you drafted?" the drill sergeant asked.

"No," said the private.

The drill sergeant smiled and said, "That's right, you volunteered."

1 votes

CATEGORY Military Jokes
posted by "Douglas" |
1 votes
rating rating rating rating rating
 

"This is your captain speaking. On behalf of my crew I'd like to welcome you aboard British Airways flight 602 from New York to London. We are currently flying at a height of 35,000 feet midway across the Atlantic.

If you look out of the windows on the starboard side of the aircraft, you will observe that both the starboard engines are on fire. If you look out of the windows on the port side, you will observe that the port wing has fallen off.

If you look down towards the Atlantic ocean, you will see a little yellow life raft with three people in it waving at you.

That's me, the copilot, and one of the stewardesses. This is a recording."

1 votes

CATEGORY Airplane Jokes
posted by "CPipe" |
$5.00 won 1 votes

The veteran politician, not known for his public speaking skills, was going to give a speech at the Olympics. He looked at the teleprompter and began, "O, O, O, O, O."

An aid quickly ran over and told him, "That is the logo sir."

1 votes

Joke Won 10th Place won $5.00
posted by "Michael Falato" |